Oddest Conversations

The conversation in my truck today was so odd that I all-but memorized it.

The über passenger, named Chase, from UofD, had some of his family with him, as it was Parent’s Weekend at the University of Delaware, my driving area in Newark, Delaware, USA.

I picked them up at his room and drove them to his fraternity house. . . a $4 trip but I knew that’s the trips I’d be making this day. Hey, I don’t über so much for the $$ as I do for the intense people watching (and listening) that the job provides. I dropped them off and went out and about, bringing parents/students to their short-drive destinations.

As I’m driving back into Newark proper from an outlying tower of student apartments, I end up returning to afore-mentioned fraternity house and pick up who?. . . . the same family. I welcomed them with open arms and lied that I’d been waiting for them since I dropped them off! LOL Nah, they didn’t buy it either.

I ended up taking them in a round-about way to the football stadium (big game today). . . but they understood because there were so many parking restrictions around the stadium.

This extended time with Chase and his family was amazingly fun to listen to, a real slice of America. I even explained to them before dropping them off that I’d be documenting the conversation in this diary (of sorts) and they seemed to get a chuckle that their über driver was so attentive.

Here’s a capture of some of what I heard, not actual quotations, I’m not THAT good at memorizing dialogue. (Thus. . . I’m NOT an actor)

“Chase, Tortice (cat) is almost 15 and not doing well, you can feel her spine.”

“Both ????? and ????? lived 18 years before they died, but after Tortice, I don’t want another cat.”

“She wants a bird”

“What, like a parakeet?”

“No, like a parrot. . . a bird!”

“you’re not getting a bird”

“If you do get a bird, get a hawk. . or a falcon, now that’s a bird”

“Why not get a sloth?”

“A what?”

“A sloth, They’re cute, cuddly, slow and they have to eat veggies three times a day but only poop once every two weeks.”

“Why not get a Koala Bear?”

“I’m not buying all that bamboo for that.”

“That’s a Panda Bear.”


“You don’t want a Koala Bear because 95% of them can deliver Syphilis to humans.”

“I don’t plan on having sex with it.”

“They can transmit it to humans with a scratch.”

“Why are we having this conversation, you’re not getting any of those.”

“How about a snake, a big one?”

“I can’t feed it mice, that’s why we can’t get a hawk or falcon or bald eagle.”

“Why would you get a pet you can’t touch?”

“You can touch a snake.”

“YOU touch the snake, it’s not getting near my neck.”

“Steve, are we here, yet?”

ME: yes, sir, enjoy your visit.


Well the new month has started and as a firm supporter of the University of Delaware, I suffer the über drought of low-fares.

Newark, DE is a college town and college folk are known for not having a lot of extra $$ to spread around and that’s where my support for the UofD community comes in. Point-in-fact is today I had over six fares in the community, that netted me a total of $19. Most of the students needed rides from places to eat on Main Street to their dorms/houses/apartments. Hey, that’s no biggie. . . I get a kick out of the conversations between young students as I remain completely silent while I drive.

The popular trend of using über since the start of the semester is among the Asian students who are of the International Studies program. Of my seven fares today, five rides were Asian students. They are respectful, kind, and never give me a lick of trouble. . . plus I think every ride included students from various countries. I’m slowly starting to discern between Mandarin, Korean, Cantonese, Japanese, Filipino (Wikang Tagalog), Vietnamese, and Chinese. It’s a wonderful slice of linguistic life that I’d never get to enjoy otherwise.

So it’s a slow $$ day but it was big on eves-dropping upon other languages.